As regular readers of this blog will know, we packed up all our belongings and moved from Italy to Sweden a few months ago. And do you know what the best thing about unpacking was? Getting my yarn back! OBVIOUSLY I had put a couple of little projects in my suitcase until the boxes arrived, but oh my, it was lovely to see the lot of it again. Especially all the beautiful colours that make up my Crochet meets Patchwork blanket.

It's been in progress for over a year now, this blanket. A while ago I took a big step back and changed the colour scheme (you can read about that and see the new colours here, if you missed it). I just love it now, and every now and then I even get the chance to add a couple more rows to it ;-)

Anyhoo, it's time to reveal the completed fuchsia block. I adore this colour for the way it pops against the greys and the white. Wherever possible, I’ve linked to the original patterns and their designers. As you’ll see, however, there are a couple that I can’t track beyond Pinterest. If anyone knows who owns the copyright to these pattern, I’d be very grateful if you could get in touch.

There you go, nine lovely free granny square patterns! To join them I used this tutorial by Carina at Carina's Craft Blog and the edged it with a continuation of the Block Stitch. The whole lot is to go with the green block I published previously. On to blue (coming very soon) and that unfathomable but beautiful colour called "brique"! 

Do let me know if you decide to make any or all of these - I’d love to see your take on my crazy patchwork project!

Tag me on Instagram (below is an "on my desk" shot I shared a couple of weeks ago) or twitter using the #crochetmeetspatchwork hashtag, or come join me on the Pasta & Patchwork facebook page. 

A toddler’s sudden refusal to bathe, despite having always been a water baby. Washing hair, okay, that had never gone entirely smoothly, but now? Not even a quick dunk? Completely, utterly, NO.

And just like that, bathing turned into a battle. Mr P&P and I have never felt comfortable forcing the Bean into something that he doesn’t want to do. It’s therefore not unheard of (not at all, actually) for the Bean’s hair not to see a drop of shampoo for weeks. As long as it gets rinsed, right!?

​When he also went through a bath-hating phase, however, we decided to step up our game and try a few different tactics. A few weeks on bathing is back on the menu most days - hurray! Hair washing still not so much, but you can’t win them all, eh. 

Every child (and their family!) is of course different, but if you find yourself going through similar bathing battles with a your toddler, you might want to try some of these:

Ditch the baby bath

I might think he’s still my baby, but what the Bean wanted was space to be Bean-ish. To ‘swim’, to splash, to have room for ALL the toys at once and then a few more too. The baby bath was demoted to washing basket, into the big tub he jumped, and suddenly it all became an adventure (make it safe by sticking down non-slip bath mats). 

Switch it up

Instead of making bathing always be about the bath, why not try the shower too? If the shower head is scary, just detach it and give them to hose. And teach them to point it INTO the shower, obviously.

Join in

During the worst of the no-bath phase, the only way to get the Bean to have a wash was to have a bath or shower with him. These were lovely moments, actually, especially on bleary, cuddly mornings.

Don’t pile on the pressure

As with so many typical toddler sticking points - eating vegetables, bedtimes, getting dressed - it’s best not to show just how much you care! If they are adamant they won’t bathe, let it go as much as possible - a little dirt doesn’t hurt anyway. Explain why it’d be best if they did have a wash, then leave it up to them to decide.

Give them as much autonomy as possible

I think the biggest issue with bathing, and washing hair in particular, is a fear of water. The Bean hates having water go in his eyes and still immediately breathes in rather than holding his breath when water runs down his face. Unsurprisingly, the sight of the shower head fills him with terror, and he cottoned on pretty quickly to a gently approaching cup too. These days, the best way to get water on his head is to let him do it himself in whatever way he chooses.

Give them a mirror

This, in combination with allowing M to take control, is what made the biggest difference. Being able to see what was happening on his head took away the fear, and in any case what kid doesn't like to make shampoo mohawks?? The one pictured below is from IKEA and attaches to the wall with a very sturdy sucker cup.
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In addition to the above strategies, we gave Paddy’s Bathroom toiletries a try. The lovely people at Babipur sent us a Bean-tailored selection:

        Stuff for Shiny Hair      |       Stuff for Hands         |          Bubbly Stuff             |           Squirty Stuff

Paddy’s products are natural in the sense that there are none of the usual nasties - SLS, parabens, phthalates or sulphates - and organic ingredients are used where possible. Paddy’s Bathroom also commit to donating 50 cents of every product sold to clean water initiatives in Africa, so as with all of the baby and child items stocked by Babipur, these toiletries are ethical as well as natural. Read on to find out what we thought of them.
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What we liked

The colourful packaging - each product has its own bright and distinctive colour scheme, which meant that the Bean quickly learned which product was to be used for what.

The scents - all of Paddy’s bathroom toiletries have fruity scents which are lovely and subtle. The tangerine bubble bath in particular smells great!

The gentleness - I'm always nervous when trying new toiletries with the Bean, because as a baby most commonly available brands made him come out in a rash. Previously I only bought a hypoallergenic, super-gentle and fragrance-free body wash from my local pharmacy, but it was very expensive. It's great that he can now use these fun and scented products without any skin issues. 

The squirtiness - although both the hand wash and the body wash come out as a foam, which is itself quite fun for kids, the body wash shoots out! Just remember to lift the cap on the top first, or you’ll be fighting with it like I was…

The value for money - at first glance these products seem expensive, with prices ranging from £4.49 to £5.50. However, the squirty products last for ages - after nearly two months’ daily use the hand and body washes are only half empty. We’re going through the bubble bath a bit faster as the Bean loves it, but even then you only need a small amount for lots of bubbles.

The toddler appeal - I wouldn't normally go out of my way to buy specific kiddie products, but you have to pick your battles: there is no denying that the Bean having his very own toiletries makes it easier to persuade him into the bath. He even liked washing his hair for a while - I have proof!

​What we didn’t like

The chummy language on the packaging - I KNOW I sound like an old git by objecting to the wording “glug this lovely stuff into the bath”, but it gets to me. Ho hum.

The pineapple scent of the squirty hand and body wash- for some reason none of us got on with that one! this product comes with a mango scent too, so perhaps that one is nicer. 

The gloopiness of the shampoo - it makes it quite hard to rinse out, which is not what you need when washing hair is already a battle. Just remember to use only a tiny amount.

Overall we liked Paddy's Bathroom toiletries and had a lot of fun trying them, so thank you to Babipur! We still have plenty of the shampoo (funny that) but we love the bubble bath in particular and will definitely be buying more when it runs out. 
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Disclosure: we received a selection of Paddy's Bathroom toiletries for the purpose of this review, but all opinions, words and bath-averse toddlers are my own.

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I've always been more of a scarf than a shawl person, but this summer the Crochet Powers That Be aligned to teach me a thing or two about the latter. First there was the big jar of salvaged Rowan merino-cotton blend, waiting to be made into something soft and warm.

Then I came across the Nordic Shawl pattern on Pinterest. It intrigued me, with its hints of Nordic folklore and promises of cosyness. It did bunny-hops across my brain until I saw purple colour schemes everywhere (I blame too much packing in 40-degree heat). 

Finally I bought it (from the very talented Anette, who blogs at My Rose Valley) and set to it. With boxes at my feet and Merino-mix on my lap in the middle of the scorching Italian summer because I was damned if I was a) going to stop crocheting, and b) feel cold once we'd arrived in the UK and then Sweden. 

It took me a good few attempts to get the colour scheme right and I ran out of purple before I could put a proper border on it, but shortly after we got to England I tucked in the last few ends and straightened out the sides. So here it is, and I love it.

The pattern itself is well-written with pictures of each of the coloured rows that make up the folksy stripes. It's great fun and works up quickly, although you do have to pay attention to the stitch count around the tip. I messed it up more than once and would have like some close-up photos of it, but in the end all was well. 

So far I've worn it a lot in the early mornings over my PJs - these pictures were taken in the Norfolk countryside in early August. It's very warm, probably much warmer and also heavier than if I'd used all cotton as the pattern suggests, but I don't mind. I'm not going to mind as I curl up under it all autumn, all winter, and probably all spring too. 

I did use cotton for the coloured stripes, because I wanted to use up some of the yarn I already had. That wasn't enough though and as it was all about getting the colour right for me, I trawled Deramores for hours (what hardship) to find the right shades in the right weights. I've ended up with quite a mishmash of brands:

Along the way I discovered I really like Cotton 8 by Scheepjeswol. It's the lightest of the  cottons I use, but I love the extensive colour range and, above all, the fact that it does not split. I love it so much that I'm using it in an upcoming jumper pattern, so look out for that if you're into Scheepjes too! 

In any case, I'm now sold on shawls. I love how they allow you to play around with colours as well as different stitches, without being so large that they linger in the WIP basket for too long (I'm looking at you, Crochet meets Patchwork blanket). Anyone got any recommendations for fun crochet shawl patterns for me to try next?

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It's been a week since we landed in Sweden. It feels very surreal to finally, really be here, after months of preparation and anticipation. Also because in so many ways it feels like the highly manicured, serene and very quiet antithesis of Italy. And finally, because the three of us are still in that just-landed, don't-know-anything bubble. A mostly happy bubble though, I'm pleased to report. Here's what we've been up to so far.

HOME
To our intense relief, the flat we'd not even seen pictures of (and which is rented to us by the university) is pretty nice. Outdated and in need of a good scrub and a big stack of crochet blankets, but I think it'll work well for us. 
Even though it's the same size as the flat we had in Milan (60m2), the layout is better and so it feels bigger. We've even managed to fashion a bedroom for the Bean in a corner of the L-shaped living room. This is a first for him (and us!) so it's very exciting! It's had to be quite makeshift and make-do, but I'll post up some photos when it's all done. 
My favourite bit of the flat is the dining area, as it's so wonderfully light. Especially on a sunny summer's morning when the toddler wants to paint at 7AM!

My not-so-favourite bit is the electric cooker. Like all electric cookers, it is an abomination that makes me burn everything and then inflict Failed Food Rage upon my family.

WORK
Mr P&P was supposed to start work yesterday, but the first day was taken up with admin and the second with battling man-flu! First impressions of the new office are good though, and the nice thing is that he's only a 15-minute walk away from home. No long commutes, thankfully.
For me, it's all change. We don't yet have a nursery for the Bean, so I guess that officially makes me a Stay-at-Home-Mum for a while! As with everything else in parenting, this is both hard and exhilarating: he makes me laugh and I love going on our daily ad-ven-cha with him, but I do worry about the financial implications of taking so much time off. And, of course, I'm not getting much time to work on all the new patterns that are swirling around in my head! 

LIFESTYLE
Oh, this is a biggie. This is so very, very different to what it was in Milan. Our flat looks out onto nothing but green and just a short walk away there's a small forest. There is a playground every 100 metres. We can walk everywhere, on foot/cycle paths that are often completely separate from the road. The air is clean and smells of the sea. 
I know it's early days, the early days of the shiny new honeymoon period. Before long we will find out what bothers us, what we just can't agree with, and what a Swedish winter is really like. But given that the lack of green and the ever-present smog contributed significantly to our desire to leave Milan, we are just a little in love with our new lifestyle and all its the pretty colours right now.

SOCIAL LIFE
Not surprisingly, it's non-existent. As I said, we're in our own little bubble. Which is kind of okay - every day so far has been taken up with admin and unpacking and shopping and walking and discovering. At the same time, however, it is strange not to be able to share it with anyone. We miss our friends, we want to Skype with family as often as possible to fill them in on all the new, all the excitement. And then there's the Bean - he's mostly only had adults to play with for three weeks. Every time he mentions his best pals in Milan, my heart breaks a little. I think that will become our most pressing challenges soon:  we need to put ourselves out there. 

CULTURE SHOCK
Gi-bloody-normous, but we're still at the stage where we can laugh about it. There is sugar in unexpected places (how can smoked fish be sweet?!), everything smells of Christmas spices although it's August. I've got no idea what goes on behind those composed and silent faces. It's bizarre but wonderful to see so many dads on paternity leave, and women wielding gigantic hedge trimmers. I'm desperate for some decent mozzarella, though I am rather pleased with the delicious cakes and smoothies available in the cafes.  I'm thrilled with the cutesy houses, though unsure about the obsession with tumble dryers (as I said, I have yet to encounter a Swedish winter).

HIS BEANNESS
Ah, my little boy. In the past two months he's had to watch us box up his toys, then said goodbye to everyone and everything that was familiar to him, and now after two blissful weeks with his beloved Grandma and Grandma we've plonked him in this perpetually windy country. Unsurprisingly, his behaviour has been erratic and at times downright insufferable. 
But I am still so very proud of him. After only a week here he is already beginning to calm down and take everything in his stride. He talks all day long about the things he sees, loves the playgrounds, and is pleased as punch with his new room. That, in particular, is amazing to me. He has shared a room and often a bed with us since he was born, and yet he is so ready, much more so than I realized, to stand on his own two feet. I have no doubt that before long he will have more friends and speak better Swedish than we do, worldly little man that he his.

(Apologies for all the grainy phone snaps - I'm still feeling a little too overwhelmed by everything to take the big camera out)

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Or rather, mid-move ramblings. We've done the hellish bit - the boxing and the cleaning and the goodbyes - and now we're staying with family in the UK for a bit of a breather before we head to Sweden on the 11th. I feel like I've arrived from another dimension, and that's not just because it's about 20° C cooler here. My mind is foggy, and while I'd love to be able to write something eloquent and coherent about what it feels like to have wrapped up 4.5 years of our lives, ramblings is all I can come up with. So here goes. 

1. I feel like I'm floating in between two lives. Habit dictates that we should be heading back over the Alps to our little flat in Milan, but my mind is trying to brace itself for I-don't-even-know-what. A glimpse, we had, but what will our day-to-day lives look like? I have no idea.

2. Twenty-two boxes, two big suitcases, two small suitcases, two rucksacks, a big bag and a handbag. That's what we left with, after having arrived in 2011 with only one suitcase and two rucksacks. Oh, and a Bean. When we arrived it was just the two of us, and we've left with an extra something rather wonderful, if very loud. 

3. I miss our friends in Milan already. Considering we were once convinced we would never make any, this is quite something. It feels strange to have lost the solidarity that comes with having (barely) survived a month of 40° C heat together. My heart aches to see the Bean and his little friends' faces light up with glee and mischief just one more time. I can't quite believe we won't be there to share the grand "rientro" in late August, nor post-summer battle scars and new-school tears at the gates. 

4. Sleep, crochet, and think of nothing. That is all I want to do. Occasionally to empty my brain of ramblings. But really, that's it. I especially don't want to think about boxes.

5. I love finally having time to watch my Bean be beanish, without work or packing or endless to-do lists cluttering up my mind. To listen to him enthuse about the big diggers building new houses in his grandparents' village, and hear him serenade Happy Birthday tooo youuuuu to everyone, every day. To read ten books with him back to back, and not watch the clock while I'm doing it. 

6. I'm astonished at how un-British we've become. We're predictably snooty about the coffee (although the flat white I had at The Coffee Cellar in Exeter was really, really good - oh the comfort!) and we can't fathom the shorts because it's clearly FREEZING. I don't know what to do with the silent shopping in the supermarkets. I think every dark-ish cloud heralds the coming of the apocalypse, while my mother-in-law just laughs and hangs out the washing. And when did everyone start serving drinks in jars?!

7. There are delights too though, like burgers at Byron, ALL the crumpets for breakfast, and crawling under a pile of cosiness instead of the air-conditioning at the end of the day.

8. I can't tell you how much I'm loving the wind. To not be breathing in hot, stale air. To feel the cobwebs be blown out of my clogged-up brain, to smell the sea rather than my neighbour's cigarette smoke. And to rejoice that soon the sea will be a permanent fixture in our lives. Very, very soon.  

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Not just a house move, in our case, but a country move: in a few weeks we’re leaving Italy to start all over again in Sweden. That distinction is important to us - hello manic packing! hello unfathomable bureaucracy! - but I’m not sure it matters all that much when you’re two.

Moving house means a big change, and big changes are hard to deal with when you’re still struggling with concepts such as time, space and distance. And also the idea of permanence: at nearly 2-and-a-half the Bean is often intensely worried that one of us leaving for a few hours, or sometimes a couple of days, means we will be gone forever. So a big change, then, which I think will throw up all sorts of questions and worries for him.

There being a few more boxes around the flat than normal doesn’t seem to be bothering him that much (what does that say about my usual fabric/yarn/stuff hoarding habits…) and because our flat is rented furnished, he won’t have to deal with the sight of it being stripped bare. Still, before long his toys will have to be boxed up and sent, and the rest of the flat will need to be turned upside down and sorted before looking not very much like our home at all. I imagine that understanding the hows and whys of this will be hard for him.

Then there are the goodbyes. Over the last month or so M has become very attached to his friends. He gets tearful when they or we leave, and he asks about them when he’s not with them. I love this, this budding love and social awareness, but it also makes me concerned for him. We intend to move at the end of the school year to make it as natural a “break” as possible, but there will still come a point where he will ask when he can see his friends again, and I will have to say “I don’t know”.

Once we have moved we will all have to deal with a lack of familiarity: a strange language, foods, no friends, no cafés where the waiter knows what we want before we’ve even sat down. A lack of routine too (I’ve no idea when he will be able to start nursery in Sweden), which is so very important for giving little people a sense of security. I imagine he will feel disoriented, and that he will want to know when we are going “home”.

To give me a few ideas for helping the Bean (and ourselves!) deal with all this, I had a nose around the site Your Expat Child. This post in particular had some good tips, which I’ve adapted to suit the Bean’s age and have started putting into practice:

We’re openly talking to him about the upcoming move. There is a calendar in the living room that shows when we’re leaving so we talked him through that. We explained that a truck will come to pick up our boxes and drive them to Sweden (very exciting, this idea of a big truck full of boxes!). And then, because a serious sit-down conversation is a bit hard when you’re two, we have these (slightly surreal) little chats whenever the opportunity arises.

Me: Do you know where we’re going today, Bean?
Bean: Going in Sweden? Onna airplane!
Me: Mmm no that’s in August. Today we’re going to the park. That’ll be fun too. Can you put your jacket on please?
Bean: Yes it’s VEEERY WINDY in Sweden!
Me: Yes it is! We’re all going to need new jackets or we’ll die of hypothermia*!

*Okay I didn’t really say this, but after 5 Mediterranean winters I’m sure as hell thinking it.

Although we’re talking to him about moving, we’re trying to shield him from the practical (soul-destroying, seemingly never-ending) drudgery associated with it. Older kids might be able to help pack up their own toys, but when you’re two the point of a box is to tip it out and hide under it. So we only pack when he’s at nursery, and at the weekends we make sure we just do normal stuff. Go to the park, see friends. It forces us to take a break and step back from it all a little, which I’m sure protects him from all the stresses buzzing around in our heads too.

We’re having a much-needed holiday after we close this chapter in Italy and open a new one in Sweden. Two weeks of R&R with Mr P&P’s parents in the UK. Down-time, grandma & grandpa time. Time for crumpets and sleep and CBeebies. And then we pick ourselves up, and start afresh.

Once we’re there I intend to embrace the unknown and turn it into an adventure. It’ll still be summery and light (right??), which I want to make the most of while Mr P&P is at work. I’ll take Bean to the park or to the beach, we’ll discover new favourite cafés and make our own routines.

Although packing up is dull as dishwater, not long after we arrive there will be no less than 15 boxes to tip out! So I intend to involve him in the fun stuff and let him help me decide where to put each item. We’ll also get a new bed for him, which he’s excited about already. New bikes, new super-duper ultra-windproof jackets. It’ll be grand.

That said, I’m sure there will also be tough days and so we’ll need to show sensitivity. Lots of people have commented that “kids are adaptable”, which they may well be, but I’m convinced it wouldn’t do to dismiss any feelings of homesickness for Milan, of missing his friends. We all have bad days, so when he has his I want to make sure he feels listened to, at least. And I fully intend to embrace the duvet+film+chocolate combo, the cure-of-all-expat-ills, when the need arises.

I’m also trying to figure out how to have little care/welcome packs for each of us sent to the new flat by the time we arrive. Just a little parcel each with a few happy-makers, a few treats. For the Bean, a new book, a funky pair of PJs, a fun toy. For Mr P&P it’ll definitely have to be something chocolate or coffee-related, though probably best to play safe and go for both. For me, a pretty mug, tea, a few balls of new yarn. Something lovely and kind, something to distract us from the strangeness around us. A little detail that may seem insignificant but which I hope will put a little extra spring in our steps.

Finally, although this post might suggest otherwise I’m trying not to overthink things. Or at least not to overthink on his behalf. This wonderfully sensitive post by Sara at Mum Turned Mom made me realise that kids are more likely to see adventure where we see challenges, and that I shouldn’t project my worries onto him. I’m scared of being lonely and feeling disoriented, but if we’re to make our new house feel like a home, our new life feel like it was always meant to be just so, I will need to let go of those fears and keep my heart and mind wide-open. After all, isn’t that how I want him to grow up to be always?

Have you moved house with a young child? Whether it was abroad or down the road, I'd love to hear about your experience and any tips you might have for helping our toddler deal with this change!

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I have to start this post on a very sad note, as last Friday the crochet community lost one of its best designers. And with it, the world lost a beautiful soul. Marinke Slump, also known as Wink of the blog A Creative Being, succumbed to depression. She wrote about her struggle a few weeks ago and I left a comment to the effect that I hoped the light would return soon. I never thought it wouldn't - how unimaginable that such a talented and creative person would disappear, just like that! But she did, because depression is a disease like any other that takes lives indiscriminately. I feel desperately sad for her and for her family.

In order to celebrate Marinke's life and also to raise awareness of depression, Crochet Concupiscence has started the #MandalasForMarinke project. You can read the full details here, but it basically involves anyone who feels like it making one of the beautiful mandalas designed by Marinke, sharing pictures of it on social media using the above hashtag, and possibly sending it in for an art show.

I've personally decided to take part only in the making, not the sending. The four little mandalas pictured are based on Marinke's Spoke Mandala pattern, and I'm going to incorporate them into my "Crochet meets Patchwork" blanket.

As you can see, the colours have changed a bit since my last update! I had a colour crisis a few weeks ago (oh the woe, I know I know). Something about the blanket had been bothering me for a while but, unable to put my finger on what exactly, I went ahead and started joining the sections I'd made. And then it hit me: light, pastel colours plus bold colours doesn't work! The copious amount of light grey was washing things out! Never mind that I'd already spent almost a year on this thing - out it all came because if you're going to put that much time and effort into something, you might as well make sure you love it.

And now I do. I've taken out the light pink altogether and replaced the light yellow with a much stronger shade that DMC (who make this yarn) call "brique". I've also reduced the amount of light grey by redoing the final row of each individual square, and the borders to each of the sections are now more colourful as well. I'm much, much happier with it like this.

So at the moment I've got the green, blue and fuchsia sections done and I'm slowly acquiring a stack of yellow/orange squares. Then there will be joining, a border of some sort, possibly stripy. Depending on just how cold Swedish winters turn out to be I might back it with a lightweight fleece and make it even more quilt-like, but as it's currently 35° C in Italy I don't want to think about that too much yet!

So... what do you think? I've almost finished a new granny square pattern and tutorial, so look out for that in the coming weeks! In the meantime, give you loved ones an extra squeeze, and consider joining in with the #MandalasForMarinke project or leaving a message on the memorial site set up by Marinke's family.

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