Pasta & Patchwork
  • Home
  • About P&P
  • Patterns
  • Recipes
  • Projects
  • Product Reviews

On conquering Systems

2/12/2015

16 Comments

 
If you were to ask me what the hardest thing about living abroad is (besides missing friends and family, of course), you’d get an answer involving the word “system”.

Bureaucratic System

Medical System

Taxation System (shudder)

All unyielding bastions of procedure and protocol so steeped in local traditions as to seem forever beyond the befuddled foreign arrival: surely if I learn enough of the language, or resort to quizzing my local friends before any System-related encounter or, god help me, try to find information online, I’ll conquer it?

But no, all too often the maze remains impenetrable. And, in Italy at least, depends very much on whether the person sat behind the counter on the day you drag your sorry and ungrammatical ass over with your forms and stamps and seals in hand is feeling benevolent or not. (Although fortunately benevolence actually seems to work wonders when you do find it - no Italian law or procedure is too rigid for a little bending, a little improvisation).

So Systems are the bane of our expat lives, and any encounter is to be dreaded. Encounters are unavoidable though: as of this week we are engaging with the Italian Education System. Because, you know, this boy is growing up. 
Picture
I think I need a little lie down simply after having written that, it feels so weighty and overwhelming…

But the crack is this: given the uncertainty over whether we’re staying or going, we need to carry on as though we’re staying. Which means making sure that, come September or January (depending on which entirely unsystematic System rule you apply), the Bean can go to preschool. Applications start round-about now. There are thousands of kids in Milan needing places.

God. Help. Us.

So far we have sort of managed to navigate Italy’s other Systems. My taxes get paid and my maternity allowance eventually materialised. The medical system, though a bit stuck in the fifties, got us through pregnancy and birth at very little cost to us. Fifty-seven thousand  signatures later, Mr P&P and I have a functioning bank account, an internet connection, a phone. There was a moment before we got married when I thought war might break out between the Belgian and Italian authorities over whose bit of pretty, official-looking paper was most official, but we got there in the end.

This, however. E-dyu-cay-shon.

Are there many more weighty decisions you make, as a parent? Is it harder as an expat parent, when you need to consider several languages and bear in mind your child might have to fit into another system elsewhere, at some point? Or is it simply hard for everyone full stop? 

I don’t know the answer to that, but I do know this: I’m wary of the traditional Italian education system. Although I feel snobbish saying that, I think it’s important to be honest about these things. I don’t like the idea of him going into a mainstream, traditional Italian school because I associate them with rigidity and conservatism. This is based on personal experience: as a former teacher I have taught within that system and I saw 7-year-olds dragging along school bags so full of books they couldn’t physically lift them, 9-year-olds being encouraged to take expensive English lessons and exams. The focus is on rote learning, stacks of homework, and getting good grades or the child is branded “cattivo” (bad). I’m aware that the Italian education system isn’t unique in this approach, nor is it necessarily ineffective for everyone, but it’s not what I want for the Bean. It doesn’t make sense to me.

What does make sense to me, on the other hand, is the Montessori method. And here we are incredibly fortunate: there are two Montessori schools within walking distance of our flat. We went to see one on Tuesday.

We think it’ll be a great fit. We believe the logical choice with regard to education for a boy who may need to move several more times before he’s done learning, who will probably grow up with a very fluid sense of culture and identity, is a method that focuses on the individual and which has been successful the world over. We might be wrong, of course, but for now we’re pretty convinced and we’re going ahead on that basis. We'll do the forms and sign fifty-eight thousand times, if that's what it takes.

As is always the case with these things, however, the school we saw is completely oversubscribed. We may not get a place. And if we don’t we shall have to engage with the mainstream Italian Education System after all.

Next week we have an interview for the Montessori school. Che sarà sarà, and all that, but PLEASE. Keep all your fingers and toes crossed for us, so that we may come out of this particular encounter with the System having made a positive and happy step to adulthood for the Bean. Please.

I think I need another little lie down now. 

Come say hello:
Pasta & Patchwork - Home

Picture
16 Comments
Phoebe @ Lou Messugo link
2/12/2015 07:09:45 am

Oh I hear you! Systems + France = bureaucratic nightmare! And it never really gets easier, I think you just learn to accept that that's the way it's done in XYZ and there's nothing you can do about it. I touched upon the administrative hell of marrying a Frenchman in my post linked up to #MyExpatFamily. Good luck with the school system!

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:03:20 am

Thank you Phoebe! I'm off to have a read of your post now. I'm sure it will bring back lots of memories of battles when we got married ;-)

Reply
Molly @ The Move to America link
2/12/2015 07:47:56 am

I completely understand this! Still trying to figure it all out and make sense of it all!

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:04:01 am

Thanks Molly, good to know I'm not the only one who finds it hard!

Reply
Yanique link
2/12/2015 08:12:49 am

It's slightly comforting finding out that systems are problematic globally. It makes dealing with the systems in the States a tiny bit more bearable. I have only heard positive things about Montessori schools so best of luck with that, fingers crossed for you guys!

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:04:56 am

Thanks Yanique! I don't think you can get away from the awkwardness of Systems anywhere, really...

Reply
Seychellesmama@gmail.com link
2/12/2015 09:01:07 am

Ooo I felt like this was all coming out if my head Eline (well in like a years time) our decision is kind of made for us with my husband teaching at the international school!!! I'm keeping everything crossed for you that little bean gets a place in the school you guys want!! I'm off to read your post on deciding about staying or going now!!!
Thank you for sharing with #myexpatfamily a huge milestone your little expat family are going through with the starting of school (I feel a bit dizzy even thinking about that for you!!!!) xx

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:06:47 am

Trust me I feel dizzy thinking about it too! It's a toughie, but how great for you guys that at least you know where to start, what with Mark teaching at a school. International schools is actually something else I need to look into, in case this Montessori school doesn't work out!

Reply
Sara (@mumturnedmom) link
2/12/2015 02:04:42 pm

I can completely understand this, it shouldn't be so hard, but it is. And each time we have to do something I feel like we're going back to the beginning. Don't get me started on US tax! I had to register the wee girl for pre-school yesterday. I stood in a queue for an hour, with the three running riot around me, and duly handed my forms over (no. 38 to do so...) and I'm just keeping everything crossed we get our first choice. I will keep them crossed for you too xx

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:09:33 am

Oh goodness yes, well done for dealing with that queue and I hope you get your first choice! x

Reply
Rachel @ The Ordinary Lovely link
2/12/2015 03:09:38 pm

Ooo, I remember this stage and don't envy you at all. Actually, you seem to have gone through the same thinking process as me. We ended up putting my eldest in to a Montessori nursery school for the little time he went in Switzerland. It was perfect for him. Perfect for me. Hope it works out for you xx

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:11:54 am

That's interesting, and good to know it worked out for you even for such a short time. x

Reply
Ersatz Expat link
2/12/2015 08:50:28 pm

Oh my god - I am breaking out in a cold sweat just thinking about 'systems'. Good luck!

Reply
Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
2/13/2015 04:12:44 am

Haha, thank you. 'Cold sweat' just about sums it up!

Reply
Merlinda link
2/13/2015 05:33:48 am

I am so happy that the education system here is easy to get and learn! My son is now foundation stage in Primary School but if I have a Montessori school that would have been better as I know that system is really child centered. #myexpatfamily

Reply
Becky Brown link
2/13/2015 10:21:56 am

With our youngest having just had an accident at school we're currently dealing with the 'system' here in France. Healthcare in the UK was just so easy, here the amount of paperwork that we have to sift through is crazy. I'm gutted we don't live near a Montessori school. We sent our eldest to Montessori nursery in the UK and I know of one particularly amazing bilingual one here but it's over an hour and a half away from us. The French education system sounds similar to the Italian one but I'm hoping our boys will get more out of life in other ways living here.

Reply

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Picture
    Hello! I'm Eline, and I've recently moved to a new corner of the internet: 
    www.emmyandlien.com/
    ​
    Do come and say hello!

    Read more:
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    Archives

    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013


    Hookin on Hump Day
    Picture
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.