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Moving to Sweden | Three months in

11/11/2015

11 Comments

 
Three months in our new home, two months since my last update. It’s been two months of some great highs, and some pretty terrible lows too. I don’t want to dwell on the latter too much - it’s a normal part of starting from scratch somewhere new. Suffice to say that bureaucrats and the boxes they attempt to fit you in are as stretched, beleaguered and cantankerous the world over. Harrumph.
In between the highs and lows things have just been ticking along. And that’s rather nice. I think when you move abroad people expect you to be off adventuring and discovering at every opportunity, but after the physical and emotional upheaval of shifting our entire lives across Europe, ticking along is good. Ordinary, safe, just nice.  
And in other news...
LIFESTYLE
In a word: outdoorsy! It’s one of the main reasons why we moved here and, my goodness, autumn has not disappointed. Brief, yes, but stunningly beautiful. And so our ordinary rhythm, when we’re not working or at school, is to head out and just walk.
Autumn foliage in Dalby, Skåne Province, Sweden
Toddler being carried in the BabyHawk mei-tai style sling
On the (many) days it rains and we’re just not quite Swedish enough yet to brave it, we laze, code, bake cheese scones (Bean’s current obsession) and make hats and scarves and things for the months ahead.
Uneventful but, as I said, nice.
Sneak preview of the Lavender Skies Skinny Scarf by Eline Alcocer - Pattern coming early 2016
HOME
We’re down to just 7 unpacked boxes! Perhaps destined to stay that way forever unless I really need something at the bottom of one of them, because let me tell you: I am done with unpacking boxes.
But despite the box fort in the master bedroom it does feel like home. The layout feels right, as does Swedish insulation. Bar curtains and wall decorations, the Bean’s bedroom is finished and super-cosy. The kitchen table by the window is my favourite spot from which to crochet and cheer on the plants braving the autumn chill on the balcony. It feels right.
Colourful toddler bedroom - love the mixture of cheaper IKEA items with vintage toys and a handmade crochet blanket
Autumn balcony garden
WORK
Lots of it! Bean started preschool in mid-September (more on that below) and as soon as the settling-in period was over, it was nose to the grindstone for me. A good thing too, as I haven´t earned a thing for 3 months. It’s been reassuring to get back into it, and now the next milestone will be to officially shift my accounts from Italy to Sweden in the New Year. Oh the excitement!

THE BEAN
Ups, downs and roundabouts with this one. The great big up that really needs celebrating is that HE LIKES HIS PRESCHOOL. Oh the relief… We like it too - it’s light and cheerful and safe, the staff are kind, the kids go traipsing round the woods nearby and eat like pint-sized kings. He is happy there, and comes home singing Swedish songs about purple lions (I think).
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Being two (nearly three!) is complicated though. When we first announced we were moving many people said that he would “be fine, kids are adaptable”. And he IS fine, in general, but then there are days when he is really not. Daddy went away for work for a few days in October and that was absolutely not fine. He still remembers what came before, he still struggles with the idea that he can’t just go back. Perhaps he still worries that one of us might just go and not come back, one day. So he is fine, he is adapting and becoming less of a little Italian and more of a little Swede by the day, but he reserves the right to feel crap and anxious about it all sometimes. As we all do, I think.
CULTURE SHOCK
More like weather shock, predictably! We have become wimps after 5 winters in Milan, especially when it comes to wind. And then there’s the fact that cowering indoors is not an option - it’s neither healthy nor realistic (unless you want to become a fuzzy-haired, barely intelligible hermit for 6 months of the year). Becoming braver and understanding what is meant by “appropriate clothing”, as preschool so helpfully put it, has been quite the education. It’s an excellent excuse for making woollie things though, as I said, and for buying a lovely new coat that is warm, windproof, waterproof AND stylish. As soon as I find one, that is (suggestions??).

SOCIAL LIFE
Kind of okay. No real friendships yet because these things take time, and so there are definitely days when we feel lonely. A few visitors (and more coming every month for the next three months!) have helped lift the mood greatly though. As has Instagram for me. No, seriously - it turns out there are some truly lovely people on there, and every now and then you get to meet up in person and talk yarn or food, and always pretty pictures. It’s a godsend, I tell you!
Pink Hydrangea

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11 Comments
Rachel @ The Ordinary Lovely link
11/11/2015 09:12:27 pm

I've been waiting for an update!! I often wonder how you're doing because I remember the worry, stress, nerves and excitement surrounding our move. I completely understand about there being only so many things that you can deal with ... when you have to spend time understanding how even the simplest of things work and then how to communicate even the most basic, everyday requirements .... exhausting!! I used to want to lock myself away for the day after a trip to the post office. So nice that you have visitors over. That used to keep me going just when I started to feel down x

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Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
11/26/2015 09:59:08 am

Ah how sweet of you to have been thinking about us! But I know you know what I'm going through, which in itself is always reassuring to hear. The visitors are definitely getting me through the challenges at the moment, plus the knowledge that the post office trips do, eventually, become routine!

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Donna link
11/11/2015 09:25:09 pm

It looks like you're settling in so well! So pleased that Bean likes preschool x

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Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
11/26/2015 09:59:45 am

I know, it is such a relief!!! x

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Sarah link
11/11/2015 09:59:09 pm

It sounds like you are really settling well, and it's definitely good news that the Bean likes his pre-school - it must all be very strange for him. How is he coping with the language? Do they speak Swedish to him at pre-school, or English?

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Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
11/26/2015 10:02:59 am

Isn't it just great news that he likes preschool? Phew, phew, PHEW! He is coping surprisingly well with the strangeness and newness. What I think is harder to deal with is the permanence of the changes - he couldn't have grasped that we really wouldn't be going back to our flat and his friends in Milan, and that is just starting to dawn on him. He's doing well with the language though. All his teachers speak English so he has no issues with communicating, and bit by bit they are encouraging him to learn Swedish. They've been wonderfully patient!

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Carie @ Space for the Butterflies link
11/11/2015 11:52:04 pm

Well yay for ticking over! It sounds like you're really starting to find your groove and that's awesome. How are you and the Bean finding the language, especially at pre school?

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Eline @ Pasta & Patchwork link
11/26/2015 10:06:31 am

Yay indeed! The Bean is doing well with Swedish, and embarrassingly I'm really not. I work from home so I never really have a chance to practice (or even learn - there is nothing there yet to practice at the moment!). His teachers all speak English so it hasn't been too much of a shock for him, but they are now very patiently trying to teach him Swedish. He seems to like the fact he knows words I don't, the cheeky thing ;-)

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Mummy and the Mexicans link
12/13/2015 05:05:41 pm

It sounds like you're gradually settling in after such a big change and great that the Bean is enjoying his preschool. He'll learn Swedish really quickly too if all his classmates use the language. Have you thought about taking some Swedish classes?

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Seychellesmama link
12/14/2015 04:03:11 pm

Sounds like all in all you guys are settling in so well! Poor little bean, he definitely has the right for some bad days, it's tough for us grown ups never mind for such a teeny little guy!! I'm loving all your pictures, it looks so beautiful there. I can't imagine the weather shock you guys must be feeling, I honestly don't know how we'd handle I t now!! X

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Nicole link
12/15/2015 05:55:36 am

Oh gosh, totally relate to all of this having moved from hot and humid Hong Kong to freezing cold Xi'an a year ago! What a culture shock! I know what you mean about "Bean" and settling into school and his new life. My Small Person was also 3.5 and whilst everyone assured me kids are "so adaptable" you know what, she struggled, much more than I anticipated. She was born in HK and that's all she knew. Anyway we had tough few months, but have come out the other side to hear her saying she "loves Xi'an!" ha ha. As you say it just takes time! And yes what a great excuse to buy coats and winter woolies! Don't think I've ever owned this many puffer jackets! ;)

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