But aaaanyway. Despite not being bought flowers (Mr P&P bought me a plant on the day that really mattered: our anniversary) or brought breakfast in bed (crumbs?! in bed!! NO), I will indulge in this: A post all about, well, me. So here goes...
1. I wake up at around 6am, to the slightest whimper or most enthusiastic “lalala” from the Bean, then haul him into bed with us. I never fail to marvel at (read: get annoyed by) Mr P&P’s complete obliviousness to the bouncing and poking, but at least I do get the first slobbery kisses of the day.
2. Cooking is my forte, but cleaning up the aftermath is not. Fortunately, the rules on the Division of Chores at P&P Towers stipulate that this is not my problem.
3. I love all the bright colours in the world, but because there are so many I can never decide on a colour scheme for our flat. My extremely colourful sofa is testament to this. Perhaps when I’m all growned up and own a big house, I shall do every room in a different, very bright colour.
5. I’m not the mother I thought I’d be. I thought I would convince my child to sleep, that schedules would be fixed, that tantrums would be nipped in the bud. The teacher in me could imagine no other way, but then a real, beautiful, willful human being arrived and I realised that it really is so very different when it’s your own (no knowing snorting at the back there).
6. The first hour of the working day is mine. Well, once the fallout from breakfast has been cleared up, discarded clothes picked up off the floor, and my stone-cold cup of tea has been reheated. Then I give myself an hour to read, to write, to tweet, to otherwise faff and procrastinate.
7. I have moments where I just want to get on a plane and go somewhere, anywhere, because I’m sick of the sleepless nights and the endless laundry and the whingeing for a 7th consecutive rendition of “We’re Going on a Bear Hunt” and the never being able to get anything finished properly. Then someone offers to take the Bean off my hands for a while so I can do something fun, and, erm, well, no. I can’t. I’d rather do the fun thing with him.
8. My favourite thing about living abroad is the visitors from home. Sharing our life, showing them the favourite café, the Bean’s park, the market we go to every Saturday. Seeing their light bulb moment - your life here is okay. I can go home now and rest assured. I can Skype with you and know rather than just imagine.
9. I’m all for food cooked from scratch at home, but I can’t quite imagine life without Knorr stockpots or frozen mashed potato.
10. My second-favourite thing about living abroad is the care packages. In case anyone’s wondering, I’ll have Yorkshire tea, milk chocolate digestives, Dorset cereal, marmalade, and a copy of Red magazine. And marmite for Mr P&P (ew).
11. I wish I was less temperamental, more patient, less controlling. But then I wouldn’t be me, I guess.
12. 14 flats/houses, 9 cities, 4 countries, 2 continents. In 15 years. I’m kinda tired of moving.
13. I don’t really do inspirational quotes or motos or slogans. Thought I shall leave you with this, a gem from my former life as a teacher:
Me: Look at this picture. What is it?
Kid 1: It's a dinosaur!
Me: Very good. What's this?
Kid 2: It's dinosaur claws!
Me: Great! What's this?
Kid 3: It's the dinosaur's tail.
Me: That's right. Dinosaurs have tails, but people don't.
Kid 4: My daddy has a tail.